Jack-This makes me feel like a man. Will-Yeah. Jack- No, seriously, I'm going to need a man after we're done.
If you're here for inspiration, you're too late. If you're here for the funeral, you're too early.
Karen- I'm not good or real... I'm evil, and imaginary.
Grace-[to Jack] Today I'm handing out lollipops and ass-whoopins and right now, I'm all out of lollipops.
Will, does it hurt your back....kissing your own ass like that?
Goodbye Prudey McPrude and hello Slutty McSluttenstein!
Oh cripes honey, let me give it to you in a nutshell. Your boyfriend's a big, flaming, leather-wearing, man-kissing, disco-dancing, vermont-living, christina aguilera-lovin', mykonos-going...honey take it home.
Karen- OK, rule number one. Unless you're served in a frosted glass, never come within four feet of my lips.
Grace- If you're looking for your Aunt Karen, she's not here. She doesn't work on days that end with..."day."