Dick Gregory
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"Richard Claxton" ""Dick"" "Gregory" is an American comedian, civil rights activist, social critic, conspiracy theorist, writer and entrepreneur.

Gregory is an influential American comedian who has used his performance skills to convey to both white and black audiences his political message on civil rights. His social satire helped change the way white Americans perceived black American comedians since he first performed in public.

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Civil Rights: What black folks are given in the U.S. on the installment plan, as in civil-rights bills. Not to be confused with human rights, which are the dignity, stature, humanity, respect, and freedom belonging to all people by right of their birth.

In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago it's a sport.

Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.

Riches do not delight us so much with their possession, as torment us with their loss.

When you have a good mother and no father, God kind of sits in. It's not enough, but it helps.

We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry, because we didn't think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.

America will tolerate the taking of a human life without giving it a second thought. But don't misuse a household pet.

I am really enjoying the new Martin Luther King Jr stamp - just think about all those white bigots, licking the backside of a black man.

Nature is not affected by finance. If someone offered you ten thousand dollars to let them touch your eyeball without blinking, you would never collect the money. At the very last moment, Nature would force you to blink your eye. Nature will protect her own.

If they took all the drugs, nicotine, alcohol and caffeine off the market for six days, they'd have to bring out the tanks to control you.

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.