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TRICHINOSIS, n. The pig's reply to proponents of porcophagy. Moses Mendlessohn having fallen ill sent for a Christian physician, who at once diagnosed the philosopher's disorder as trichinosis, but tactfully gave it another name. 'You need and immediate change of diet,' he said; 'you must eat six ounces of pork every other day.' 'Pork?' shrieked the patient -- 'pork? Nothing shall induce.

Ambrose Bierce

I'm carrying so much pork, I'm beginning to get trichinosis.

Phil Gramm