George Ade
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"George Ade" was an American writer, newspaper columnist, and playwright.

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Anybody can win unless there happens to be a second entry.

'Whom are you?' he asked, for he had attended business college.

Nothing is improbable until it moves into the past tense.

The time to enjoy a European trip is about three weeks after unpacking.

A man never feels more important than when he receives a telegram containing more than ten words.

A good folly is worth what you pay for it.

After being Turned Down by numerous Publishers, he had decided to write for Posterity.

To insure peace of mind ignore the rules and regulations.

A friend who is near and dear may in time become as useless as a relative.

If we still had the six-game season ticket available, I'm convinced all the five-game packages would have been six-game sales. But it was a record-breaking year for ticket sales no matter how you look at it.

For parlor use, the vague generality is a life saver.