FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears.   The savage dies -- they sacrifice a horse  To bear to happy hunting-grounds the corse.  Our friends expire -- we make the money fly  In hope their souls will chase it to the sky.            . -Ambrose Bierce

 

FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears. The savage dies -- they sacrifice a horse To bear to happy hunting-grounds the corse. Our friends expire -- we make the money fly In hope their souls will chase it to the sky. .


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This quote is just one of 836 total Ambrose Bierce quotes in our collection. Ambrose Bierce is known for saying 'FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears. The savage dies -- they sacrifice a horse To bear to happy hunting-grounds the corse. Our friends expire -- we make the money fly In hope their souls will chase it to the sky. .' as well as some of the following quotes.

REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.

Ambrose Bierce

PIE, n. An advance agent of the reaper whose name is Indigestion. Cold pie was highly esteemed by the remains. Rev. Dr. Mucker (in a funeral sermon over a British nobleman) Cold pie is a detestable American comestible. That's why I'm done -- or undone -- So far from that dear London. (from the headstone of a British nobleman in K.

Ambrose Bierce

IRRELIGION, n. The principal one of the great faiths of the world.

Ambrose Bierce

Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.

Ambrose Bierce

HEAD-MONEY, n. A capitation tax, or poll-tax. In ancient times there lived a king Whose tax-collectors could not wring From all his subjects gold enough To make the royal way less rough. For pleasure's highway, like the dames Whose premises adjoin it, claims Perpetual repairing. So The tax-collectors in a row Appeared before the throne to pray .

Ambrose Bierce