Victor Borge
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"Børge Rosenbaum", known professionally as "Victor Borge", was a Danish comedian, conductor and pianist who achieved great popularity in radio and television in the United States and Europe. His blend of music and comedy earned him the nickname "The Clown Prince of Denmark", "The Unmelancholy Dane", and "The Great Dane".

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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.

You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?

I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible...and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.

Santa Claus has the right idea; visit people once a year.

I only know two pieces; one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.