The only good ideas are the ones I can take credit for.

184

Why is it OK to love without a reason, but anger requires justification?

162

Wasting sarcasm is a sin.

160

Ever heard Victoria's REAL secret? Too much support hurts.

138

Don't get yourself arrested and make your day worse! If you need to vent, just smash something that's already broken! You can't get in trouble for wrecking the unsalvageable!

130

I'm NOT short. I prefer to think there is simply more space above my head for word balloons full of devastatingly pithy witticisms.

98