Joan Rivers
FameRank: 8

"Daytime Emmy Award for Outstanding Talk Show Host/Outstanding Talk Show Host"

1990: The Joan Rivers Show}}}}}}

"Joan Alexandra Molinsky" , known as "Joan Rivers", was an American actress, comedian, writer, producer, and television host noted for her often controversial comedic persona — where she was alternately self-deprecating or sharply acerbic, especially toward celebrities and politicians.

Rivers came to prominence in 1965 as a guest on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson/The Tonight Show. Hosted by her mentor, Johnny Carson, the show established Rivers' comedic style. In 1986, with her own rival program, The Late Show (1986 TV series)/The Late Show with Joan Rivers, Rivers became the first woman to host a late night network television talk show. She subsequently hosted The Joan Rivers Show (1989-1993), winning a Daytime Emmy Award/Daytime Emmy for Outstanding Talk Show Host.

As the author of 12 best-selling memoir and humor books and numerous comedy albums, Rivers was nominated in 1984 for a Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album/Grammy Award for her album What Becomes a Semi-Legend Most? and was nominated in 1994 for the Tony Award for Best Actress in a Play for her performance of the title role in Sally Marr...and her escorts.

If you enjoy these quotes, be sure to check out other famous comedians! More Joan Rivers on Wikipedia.

I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.

Money can't buy you happiness but it can pay for the plastic surgery.

I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.

A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.

I don't exercise. If God wanted me to bend over, he'd put diamonds on the floor.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present.

Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise.

I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, ``Get the hell off my property.''.

It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom.

I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

You make the beds, you wash the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again.