Cynthia Heimel
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"Cynthia Heimel" is a playwright, television writer, and the author of several satirical books which are aimed primarily at a female readership. To those who have heard of her but have not read her books, her works are probably best known for their unusual titles.

Heimel's first book Sex Tips for Girls, was a semi-satirical take on Cosmopolitan and their "how to please your man" approach to feminism. Though she gives actual sex tips, Heimel's main focus was sexual self-confidence for women and the idea that women actually enjoy sex.

Heimel has stated (in Advanced Sex Tips) that she was not accepted by the feminist movement; that being too sexy to be an academic feminist and too angry for "women's" magazines, she sometimes had difficulty finding outlets that would publish her work; and that for this reason, she accepted an offer to work for Playboy and was the writer of its "Women" column for decades. Her column was ended around 2000 when the editors of Playboy expressed concern that Heimel's feminist attitudes would put off male readers.

She resides in Oakland, California.[http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?z=y&endeca=1&isbn=068485645X&itm=1]

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You know what we can be like: See a guy and think he's cute one minute, the next minute our brains have us married with kids, the following minute we see him having an extramarital affair. By the time someone says "I'd like you to meet Cecil," we shout, "You're late again with the child support!"

We have no faith in ourselves. I have never met a woman who, deep down in her core, really believes she has great legs. And if she suspects that she might have great legs, then she's convinced that she has a shrill voice and no neck.

Reading is an escape, an education, a delving into the brain of another human being on such an intimate level that every nuance of thought, every snapping of synapse, every slippery desire of the author is laid open before you like, well, a book.

All men are not slimy warthogs. Some men are silly giraffes, some woebegone puppies, some insecure frogs. But if one is not careful, those slimy warthogs can ruin it for all the others.

Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in those tiny toilets.

What are answering machines for if not to break up woth someone who bores you?

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net.

Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with the most appalling people. Take a cool, appraising glance at his pals.