My pen is my razor, and I've been bleeding.

259

I wonder when someone will grow the testicles to say to americans everywhere, 'Enough with the self-medicating.' Seriously. What ever happened to dealing with life? Life is pain. Life is inconvenience. Life is a tall, cool glass of "F**k You". Step away from the Prozac and Xanax, and Drink Up, Bitches. Refills are on the house...

248

I am a precious evil.

242

On the Catholic priesthood: I refuse to consider anything said to me about saving my soul by any man who spends all his time with one hand on the Bible and his other hand thrust down the pants of an adolescent child. I don't want to hear it.

210

Utter happiness is a fallacy. The best most of us can hope for is that occasional span of time which occurs at irregular lengths and intervals throughout our lives wherein for an all too ephemeral period, nothing in particular sucks about living.

197

For one to expect or ask things of others that he himself, if asked, would not be willing to do or give, is the worst kind of arrogance.

177

Love yourself every day, and twice on Sunday.

158