There are not yet any comments on this quote. Why not register / login and be the first?
This quote is just one of 9 total Jack Handy quotes in our collection. Jack Handy is known for saying 'I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.' as well as some of the following quotes.
My young son asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth - that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally - but I didn't want to upset him.
As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable - until I realized it wasn't a nectarine at all, but A HUMAN HEAD!
If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong though. It's Hambone.
The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I'll put a very large blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat. And if someone asks me why I didn't get more meat, I'll just say, "Oh, you mean this?" and pull out a big piece of meat from inside the blob of potatoes, where I've hidden it. Good magic trick, huh?
This quote is just one of 9 total Jack Handy quotes in our collection. Jack Handy is known for saying 'I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.' as well as some of the following quotes.