75 toilet quotes follow in order of popularity. Be sure to bookmark and share your favorites!

I refuse to go into a fast-food outlet - to use the toilet even - in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought I was sneaking in a quick burger.

Jonny Wilkinson

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No water, you can't use the toilet. And that's a big concern in the house.

Bob Buckley

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There's nothing behind a closed door besides a toilet.

Joe Hurwitz

Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.

Joey Bishop

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If I'm sitting on the toilet and I'm looking at the grouting on the tiles, that grouting really gets me. Mothers have a thing about grouting.

Sharon Osbourne

We're looking at solar panels and maybe a composting toilet.

Kathy Plunk

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Most of the time he [Marlon Brando] sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper.

Rex Reed

I wouldn't make him a toilet cleaner in Parliament House, let alone Leader of the Opposition.

Mark Latham

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We are all shopping in the same stores, so if someone hoards the toilet paper, there's less for us.

Jason Alderman

Looks like the grill to the fan has fallen off, it's behind the toilet here.

Michelle Meredith

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We're not going to try to get these people not to respond. But any lawyer worth his salt will see the subpoenas are not worth so much toilet paper.

Dick Deguerin

Individuals interested in donating can call The Bridge. We do still need food, paper products, money, cleaning supplies - if people could call and coordinate donations. People loved donating clothing to The Bridge - it was an avenue; if they could put their focus on collecting cleaning supplies - toilet paper, food etc. - these items are a priority.

Maggie Jones

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France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.

Billy Wilder

Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that's only a recent development.

Barry Humphries

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You can stand up in front of a bunch of four-year-olds and just say 'toilet,' and they'll start laughing.

Charlie Williams

Unfortunately I had to leave my favorite paper supplier because their toilet paper costs went out of control.

Jennifer Smith

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All it takes is someone to dump mercury down the toilet, and I've got this problem again.

Glenn Dishong

There's sort of an art to the whole fence, toilet, concession thing that's sometimes looked at as no big thing. But it's taken years for us to get it down to the way we need it.

Paul Tollett

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I don't want to sugarcoat this. It is not something that is easily done or that is a sure thing. But I have great arguments. For anybody willing to listen, your case is easy to sell. Without this change, fire safety will go down the toilet.

Terry Lewis

They can't make a noise, flush the toilet, run the water. They can't do anything to let the people working there know that there's someone up in the annex.

Derrick Null

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