I refuse to go into a fast-food outlet - to use the toilet even - in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought I was sneaking in a quick burger.
Jonny Wilkinson
75 quotes about toilet follow in order of popularity. Be sure to bookmark and share your favorites!
Psychiatry's chief contribution to philosophy is the discovery that the toilet is the seat of the soul.
Alexander Chase
No water, you can't use the toilet. And that's a big concern in the house.
Bob Buckley
Toilet paper all over the floor. Bodies. Babies dying in front of your face.
Tracy Perkins
There's nothing behind a closed door besides a toilet.
Joe Hurwitz
I told them this is not your regular case. I told them I lost a high-tech toilet seat. The detectives contacted me and said they're going to try and find it.
Hamid Shoushtari
Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.
Joey Bishop
If I'm sitting on the toilet and I'm looking at the grouting on the tiles, that grouting really gets me. Mothers have a thing about grouting.
Sharon Osbourne
We're looking at solar panels and maybe a composting toilet.
Kathy Plunk
They got knocked into the toilet. My dog ate my homework. Oh, and it ate my pain medication. ... They got stolen.
Marc Kleinman
I wouldn't make him a toilet cleaner in Parliament House, let alone Leader of the Opposition.
Mark Latham
In some cases suicidal girls were stripped naked and isolated for extended time periods in windowless empty 'dark rooms' with only a drain in the cement floor to serve as a toilet.
Alex Acosta
We are all shopping in the same stores, so if someone hoards the toilet paper, there's less for us.
Jason Alderman
Looks like the grill to the fan has fallen off, it's behind the toilet here.
Michelle Meredith
We're not going to try to get these people not to respond. But any lawyer worth his salt will see the subpoenas are not worth so much toilet paper.
Dick Deguerin
Individuals interested in donating can call The Bridge. We do still need food, paper products, money, cleaning supplies - if people could call and coordinate donations. People loved donating clothing to The Bridge - it was an avenue; if they could put their focus on collecting cleaning supplies - toilet paper, food etc. - these items are a priority.
Maggie Jones
My giant tortoise now weighs 100 pounds, eats 50 pounds of hay a week and goes to the toilet like a horse.
Dean Harper
France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.
Billy Wilder
Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that's only a recent development.
Barry Humphries
You can stand up in front of a bunch of four-year-olds and just say 'toilet,' and they'll start laughing.
Charlie Williams
We are going to train the toilet cleaners to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she can take care of the entire toilet, including changing bulbs, repairing locks, repairing leaky taps, doing periodical heavy cleaning, technical cleaning, taking away urine salt inside the toilet and recommending changes to the toilet layout.
Jack Sim
Unfortunately I had to leave my favorite paper supplier because their toilet paper costs went out of control.
Jennifer Smith
Just about anything anybody can use, we give out free from toilet paper on up. I feel like God sent me here. Jerry helped me raise my four kids when I lived in Longview Place and St. John's Lutheran School was nearby.
Maggie White
All it takes is someone to dump mercury down the toilet, and I've got this problem again.
Glenn Dishong
Well, where do we get our paper? Where do we get our toilet paper? The best thing that you can do to help out is to be very conservative. Don't waste a lot of paper.
Rebecca Jones
There's sort of an art to the whole fence, toilet, concession thing that's sometimes looked at as no big thing. But it's taken years for us to get it down to the way we need it.
Paul Tollett
I don't want to sugarcoat this. It is not something that is easily done or that is a sure thing. But I have great arguments. For anybody willing to listen, your case is easy to sell. Without this change, fire safety will go down the toilet.
Terry Lewis
They can't make a noise, flush the toilet, run the water. They can't do anything to let the people working there know that there's someone up in the annex.
Derrick Null
Morale went in the toilet, and I'm speaking mildly, when this happened.
Mike Buesing
You're much more likely to be attacked by lightning or by your own toilet than you are by a shark.
Peter Benchley
The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.
Bob Monkhouse
I went to the toilet in Saturday's match with (Tommy) Haas because I was tired and not feeling too great.
Andrei Pavel
It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.
George Lindsey
We gave away a $5,200 toilet. It's just the most fantastic toilet you could ever imagine. It has an infrared signal. It has hoses and vacuums and all kinds of implements that attend to every possible need.
Michael Davies
It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.
Rod Serling
Our Clog Clinic researchers have been studying toilet-plumbing problems since 1996, and they maintain that clogs can be avoided if proper steps are taken.
Stu Schneider
I can only state that the toilet cassette was empty at pick up.
Michael Becker
In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.
Mark Twain
It really is unappealing. On a good day, scrubbing a toilet is not anybody's idea of a good time.
Gerry Elwood
There's the famous Southwest toilet paper race. Passengers pass the roll as fast as they can from front to back without breaking it.
George Hamlin
Why SCOTT Tissue? We've been bringing consumers common-sense solutions for more than a century. None of us like it when true toilet terror strikes and, by providing practical solutions to avoid clogs, we help ourselves and our plumbing community.
Stu Schneider
Coach was not happy with us. He told us we just need to flush this (game) down the toilet and forget about it.
Mel Thomas
The one thing you don't want to happen is that you start talking about common systems, for example, and you get the gold-plated toilet out the other end.
Theresa Hitchens
Like when I'm in the bathroom looking at my toilet paper, I'm like 'Wow! That's toilet paper?' I don't know if we appreciate how much we have.
Peter Nivio Zarlenga
Dead people never seem to address the obvious - the things you'd think they'd be bursting to talk about, and the things all of us not-yet-dead are madly curious about, ... Such as: Hey, where are you now? What do you do all day? What's it feel like being dead? Can you see me? Even when I'm on the toilet? Would you cut that out?
Mary Roach
I don't know where they came up with that number. We had a contract that stipulates a $25-per-day rental, $25 per service of each unit and $25 if the toilet is moved. That doesn't add up to $150.
Druscilla Miller
All of our egos were flushed down the toilet after that game. We were knocked down from riding that high horse.
Leroy Foster
It gets real costly if all of a sudden we have to buy toilet paper. Stuff like milk and meat can run thousands of dollars a year.
Chris Megison
Hemorrhoids can bleed, typically after a bowel movement, producing blood-streaked stool or toilet paper, ... The blood may turn water in the toilet bowl red. However, the amount of blood is usually small, and hemorrhoids rarely lead to severe blood loss or anemia.
Alfred The Great
Pictures that test great go out and go in the toilet. And pictures that test poorly, all of a sudden they'll come out of the pack and people like them, but they don't get a chance because a studio won't really get behind it if it tests poorly. It's a mess. I mean, it's really a mess.
George A. Romero
There was no brick that came through my window. It was actually a toilet-stool full of feces.
Herman Boone
It's $40 million down the toilet, ... He's worse off now than if he hadn't held a special election. And these policy reforms — ideas that have merit — are now repudiated.
Arnold Steinberg
We've got uniforms pants, boots, t-shirts, underwear and toilet supplies.
Dean Smith
You don't want to have to be the man and the woman in the relationship. I always say you want a man who can fix the toilet.
Pamela Anderson
I don't know how you can clean someone else's toilet. I can barely touch my own.
Frances Mcdormand
I walk into rooms and I don't know why I'm there. I'm like, 'Why am I standing in front of the toilet now?'
Matthew Broderick
They put this Darth Vader mask on his face, it was like some Rube Goldberg thing glued to this guy. It covered his face like a toilet seat. It was connected to a machine that I swear you could run a swimming pool on, and it sounded like a freight train.
Peter Farrell
Toilet and a bed. There'll be other prisoners in that little quad, and sometimes they'll communicate by shouting back and forth to each other.
Knut Johnson
They take the growth at a reasonable price approach and buy things that are undervalued, not companies that are going down the toilet.
Todd Trubey
France is the only country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper.
Billy Wilder
That Florida kid or that Georgia kid, I'd have them clean a toilet just as quick I would any other kid who doesn't have a college home (next year).
Michael Payne
The typical toilet seat only has 49 germs per square inch versus the desktop that has 21,000. That's problematic because a lot of people like me eat lunch at their desks. A typical office disinfects the toilet every night. Most people don't disinfect their desks.
Allison Janse
They were way better than us in this one. We had no chance. We just want to flush this one down the toilet. These are the games you want to forget.
Rob Willson
Baghdad stinks. There's constant water in the street. There's no one to pick up the trash, so it all piles up outside. ... All the American toilet paper was clogging the Baghdad sewer system. It wasn't built to take it, so there's backed-up water everywhere and kids playing in it. Baghdad is just a dirty place.
John Crawford
One flush of today's Western toilet would provide enough water for washing, cooking and eating for one person in a developing country.
Erik Peterson
He was cleaning out vents in the ceiling in which inmates had put wads of toilet paper.
Elise Schaffer
Mothers born on relief have their babies on relief. Nothingness, truly, seems to be the condition of these New York people. They are nomads going from one rooming house to another, looking for a toilet that functions.
Elizabeth Hardwick
We pulled toilet rooms out towards the hallway. That puts the patient zone further away from the corridor to cut down on noise, and then when janitors come to clean the rest rooms they don't have to come all the way into the room and it's less disturbing to patients.
Alfred Anderson
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