It's one thing to thank your mother, or someone who helped get your first job so you didn't have to sleep in your car. Hilary Swank gave one of the best speeches (for 1999's Boys Don't Cry) by staying personal. But who wants to hear a list of attorneys?

Stewart was helplessly miscast, to put it in Hollywood terms. He presided with some dignity and class and coolness, but he will not be invited back.

You don't mock the importance of the event. This isn't the MTV Music Video Awards. We expect the Oscar host to be like a beloved aunt or uncle on stage playing the ringmaster to a family reunion.

In some ways, your Oscar speech is as important as the movie performance that got you the award. It's your chance to live forever in showbiz history. Or bore them to tears and come off as selfish and pampered.

Is it nastier, or is it that I see the same negative commercial every 15 minutes? It's more in your face, with greater frequency, than ever before.

It has the most nominations, and it won all the early awards. It's a big screen epic with A-list stars.

This is George Clooney's big year.

The Oscar is supposed to be the ultimate blessing of your career, and in fact it can turn out to be the ultimate curse.

Poor Paul Newman had lost seven times and then finally didn't show up for number eight and then won for the 'Color of Money'.