Kin Hubbard
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"Frank McKinney Hubbard" was an United States/American cartoonist, List of humorists/humorist, and journalist better known by his pen name " "Kin" Hubbard".

He was creator of the cartoon "Abe Martin of Brown County" which ran in United States/U.S. newspapers from 1904 until his death in 1930, and was the originator of many political quips that remain in use. North American humorist Will Rogers reportedly declared Hubbard to be "America's greatest humorist."

The American playwright, screenwriter and journalist Lawrence Riley wrote the biographical play Kin Hubbard (1949) in his memory. It starred Tom Ewell and June Lockhart.

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It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.

There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?

When someone says, 'It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing', it's the money.

Folks that blurt out just what they think wouldn't be so bad if they thought.

The only time some fellows are ever seen with their wives is after they've been indicted.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

When you consider what a chance women have to poison their husbands, it's a wonder there isn't more of it done.

Never get married while you're going to college; it's hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you've already made one mistake.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation.

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has travelled is the worst.

A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on.

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.

Everything comes to him who waits but a loaned book.

Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you.

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.

There is plenty of peace in any home where the family doesn't make the mistake of trying to get together.

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.

Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while.

So far I haven't heard of anybody who wants to stop living on account of the cost.

The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.