Joe E. Lewis
FameRank: 5

"Joe E. Lewis", born "Joseph Klewan" in New York City, was an American comedian and singer.

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Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.

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I drink to forget I drink.

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It pays to get drunk with the best people. -Joe E. Lewis
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You're not really drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

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I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.

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Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people. -Joe E. Lewis
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You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

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I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.

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You only live once -- but if you work it right, once is enough. -Joe E. Lewis
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